Slice of Life Day 11: Analysis Paralysis

Perched on the edge of a kidney table, I peer around my new classroom. It is dimly lit, I hadn't bothered to turn the lights on and outside the sun was beginning to set. It feels like someone else's classroom that I have snuck into, rather than the future home of my third graders. I take in the dusty double borders that line every possible edge in the room. I look down at the three large beaded lizard keychains that came attached to the single key I have given to this room. In my peripheral vision I see the larger than life, paper mache Lily from Lily's Purple Plastic Purse watching me from the top shelf. This was the third day I had stood frozen in my new classroom. Overwhelmed by its current state. Unsure of what I wanted it to be, but sure that it could be amazing. I just had to figure out how to get it there.

Standing in my very first classroom, the summer before school started is my earliest memory of ANALYSIS PARALYSIS. I am a classic over-thinker, a worrier, a what if-er.

• What if the small group area would work better by the window than the door?
• Do you think someone will come back and look for Lily? She looks pretty old and is super crusted with dust...but do I really want to be the one to throw her away?
• How can I have the room put together enough that parents don't think I haven't done anything when they come to Meet the Teacher Night, but leave enough space for the students to make it their own?

I get myself so spun in the trails of possibilities that I find it nearly impossible to make a decision. On the outside it looks like procrastination, but I promise you, on the inside my brain is in overdrive. 

Thirteen years later, I wish I could say that I have gained enough wisdom to conquer analysis paralysis. While I still find myself overthinking at times, I have started to realize that part of the paralysis comes from the pressure I put on myself to get it right the very first time. Instead, if I choose to be flexible and responsive, I can aim to make the most informed to decision in the moment and respond flexibly once I have more information. Often the jumping in and trying something actually provides you with information to make a better decision than you could have without it.